For years, real estate agents have used “buyer love letters” as a strategy to help their clients stand out in competitive markets. These personal letters—often accompanied by a family photo—aim to appeal to a seller’s emotions by sharing the buyer’s background, values, and hopes for the home. While the practice may seem harmless or even heartwarming, it carries significant legal risk under Fair Housing laws and can expose both agents and brokers to potential liability.
The Origins of Buyer Love Letters
Before digital contracts and remote negotiations became the norm, buyer agents would present offers in person. These presentations often included verbal descriptions of the buyer—such as their family composition, financial goals, or emotional connection to the property. Over time, this evolved into the written “buyer love letter,” intended to humanize the offer and gain favor with the seller.
But what began as a heartfelt gesture has become a compliance landmine.
The Legal Problem with Buyer Love Letters
Federal and state Fair Housing laws prohibit sellers from making decisions based on personal characteristics of a buyer that fall within protected classes. If a seller selects one offer over another due to information in a love letter—such as family status, religion, or race—they may be engaging in discriminatory behavior, even if unintentionally.
For example, a seller saying, “We want a family to raise children here like we did,” may violate fair housing laws by implying a preference for buyers with children, thus discriminating based on familial status, a protected class under federal law.
Protected Classes Under Fair Housing Laws
At the federal level, the following characteristics are protected:
- Race
- Color
- Religion
- Sex
- National Origin
- Familial Status
- Disability
In New Jersey, state law expands these protections to include:
- Age
- Ancestry
- Creed
- Marital Status
- Civil Union or Domestic Partnership Status
- Gender Identity and Expression
- Sexual and Affectional Orientation
- Military Service
- Nationality
- Source of Lawful Income
That means even a letter referencing a recent military deployment or a photo of a smiling couple with children could lead to decisions based on non-financial, protected characteristics—creating serious legal exposure.
The Same Risks Apply in Rental Transactions
Buyer love letters aren’t the only concern. In rental transactions, New Jersey law clearly prohibits landlords from denying applicants based on their source of income—including Section 8 housing vouchers. Saying “we don’t accept Section 8” is a violation of state law and opens the door to litigation and penalties.
Broker Responsibility and Risk Mitigation
Real estate brokers have a legal and ethical obligation to supervise the agents working under their license. This includes:
- Educating agents on the risks of buyer love letters
- Developing clear policies that prohibit presenting or accepting love letters
- Ensuring agents know how to explain the legal rationale to clients
- Implementing Standard Operating Procedures that remove emotional appeals from the offer process entirely
Brokers who fail to address this issue may face direct liability if a Fair Housing complaint arises from a transaction.
Best Practices for Brokers and Agents
To protect all parties and stay compliant with Fair Housing laws:
- Focus strictly on the terms of the offer: price, financing, contingencies, and closing dates.
- Avoid discussing the buyer’s personal characteristics, even if volunteered.
- Do not submit or review buyer love letters—even if they come from another agent.
- Include clear disclaimers in buyer consultation and listing agreements.
Conclusion: Remove the Emotion, Reduce the Risk
While the intent behind buyer love letters may be sincere, the legal consequences can be significant. Fair Housing compliance must take precedence over emotional appeals, and brokers must lead the way in setting policy and training agents to avoid potential violations.
By eliminating love letters from your offer process, you’re not only reducing risk—you’re upholding the law and protecting your clients.
